Hills and thrills

Wales was wonderful. It always is, but it was particularly fabulous last weekend. Cold and bright with mysterious low lying mist in the valleys and dazzling sunshine bouncing off the hills. We set off in good time Saturday morning and had reached the top of Corn Ddu by noon. I was feeling a bit full of cold, but once I'd got over the first shock of sharp air and steep ascent tackling the deceptive Y Gyrn, I could have trekked all day. We didn't make it all the way over to Fan-y-Big which was a shame - but we wanted to get back to the car before it got dark. I was tired and pleasantly achey all over by the end of the day and felt like I'd pushed myself nicely. I think G broke a sweat a couple of times. He was very gallant and waited for me when I was going slow and let me have the last drop of tea from the flask on the way back. It's such a special place. So glad we went there together.

Brecon was covered in thick icy mist and it was quite depressing leaving the hills and heading into the town. A steaming bag of chips in the car helped restore some vigour. We found our Youth Hostel, which was a bit tumbledown and draughty and very busy. As predicted, we didn't get our double bunk room together. We had to be split up into single sex dorms because they were so full. I spent a sleepless night with a very odd woman who complained about the cold then got up in the middle of the night to open the window in case we should feel claustrophobic, she said... The car thermometer registered -5C in the morning so it's a miracle we didn't freeze. Glad I had my sleeping bag for extra protection.

G had a bit of a rough night too so we were both up and off early heading across the top of the National Park then down towards Carmarthen and the coast. We stopped off at a mysterious mound called Trecastle on the way. I've driven past it a few times and wondered what it is. I think it must be an old motte and bailey now a bit sunken and covered in mature trees. We did a bit of trespassing to get to the top and marvel at the loveliness of the frozen morning. Then got a bit cold and decided to motor on.

Llansteffan was as perfect and as beautiful as I always remember it. We had a lovely walk along the beach and round the headland as far as we could before the mud flats started to look a bit dangerous. The pink house I saw on a family holiday many years ago is still standing, but is now white and rather smart looking. We explored the castle ruins and had a swift pint in the village pub before driving back up to Laugharne and on to Hurst House.

I was really worried about Hurst House. Staying there was going to be an extravagant treat and I didn't want to feel as if we were being ripped off. It has had a lot of good publicity yet bad reviews from people who have actually stayed there. I booked it on the strength of the publicity then read the reviews on Tripadvisor, but by then it was too late to cancel. Anyway, with expectations lowered and after an exhausting night courtesy of the YHA, we were utterly delighted. The place is undergoing extensive renovation, but the builders were all quiet on Sunday. The exterior of the main house is gorgeous and inside is a little vibrant and quirky, but not totally out of keeping. The house itself has got such age and charm that it seems to quite enjoy that young upstarts have turned it into a swanky retreat. It was very welcoming and all the more relaxing for a being a little rough around the edges.

We collapsed on the big bed and watched the B&O telly for a while, then had hot baths in the lovely bathroom with views over the marshes. Cocktails in the bar by the log fire then a fabulous four course meal restored us both. I had a fishy dish featuring samphire risotto and G had the biggest fillet of beef I've ever seen. We were too tired to get plastered. We just enjoyed the deliciousness of the food, petted the sweet young cat that seemed to have free roaming rights and made fun of the only other couple staying who looked thoroughly miserable. Maybe they didn't appreciate the quirky charm and spectacular food quite as much as we did. Or maybe they were allergic to cats.

We had breakfast in bed and didn't bother checking out until 11. Both feeling a bit tired we had a quiet mooch around Laugharne then set off on the long drive home. Felt very soppy and romantic and didn't at all enjoy setting out for work on Tuesday morning. Not sure where the rest of the week has gone.

I need to get the house in order this weekend as we may have an overnight guest next weekend after the work christmas party. I also need to decide what to wear for the party. I don't fancy the hard slog and expense of finding something new, but I don't think I have anything suitable at all. I don't really want to go.

Slow news day

Not much to report today. Work is a bit frustrating. Just getting to the niggly panic stage of my current project - pre-first draft nerves. I'm hoping the document will come together and the contributors are writing what they're supposed to be writing. Will find out on Friday when it'll be up to me to pull the full version together. Plenty of time in hand for a nice production job next week, but the work always expands to fill the time available.

Chatted to Mum on the mobile during a crispy lunchtime walk. She's having trouble with the aging relatives who are not very close by and not exactly easy to help. She's also panicking about Christmas now that Dad's old banger has finally conked out and he's taken her wheels so he can get to work and back. She can't go Christmas shopping and has to stay in all day. At least Coco is happy.

Also spoke to Tabi who is very excited about our pre-Christmas get together with the folks. I daresay it'll be a boozy night with the over-excitement potential of us all being together properly for the first time in a long time. I'm really looking forward to New Year in Cornwall I have to say. Poor Tabs has to work a long day on the 1st but has got 31st afternoon and evening off. New Year's Eve sounds like it'll be a proper rowdy affair, but G said out of the blue the other evening, we'll have to go to St Ives over New Year. Picturing a chilled out chilly walk on the beach New Years Day. Our hangovers notwithstanding, it will be lovely to get out in the fresh air together and breathe in some new beginnings.

London and Lara

Early start this morning for a 9 a.m. meeting in Islington. It's amazing how I can get straight up at 05.45 but find it impossible to move from under the covers at 07.30 every other day. Enjoyed arriving in plenty of time for an AMT breakfast and avoidance of the tube chaos, but the customer was a little disorganised and didn't offer us anything to drink or even a chance to nip to the loo. Hard work maintaining ultra-focus during a 4hr meeting in those conditions.

Made it all worthwhile with a quick stop at Lara's before heading home. Had a good squeeze of both gorgeous bairns and enjoyed a customary analytical chat with Lara. She urged me to avoid burning bridges workwise before going away and not to dismiss the idea that they may be open to a period of extended leave. She's right of course. It'll be over before we know it and if there's a chance at all of an income to look forward to on our return, I should take it.

I just know that would mean committing to a return date and coming back to this neck of the woods - where neither of us really want to be. It's by far the most sensible approach and would mean we had time and space to decide on the details of 'the next phase'. Then again work might very well tell me to stick my passport somewhere unmentionable. Will require a carefully crafted persuasive proposal. The boss will see straight through it!

LaMountain

Ray LaMontagne was amazing live. He looks like a kind of muppet hobo with a flip-top head and raggedy clothes, but when he sings it's raw and visceral and really quite beautiful. His singing voice is huge, but he didn't speak to the audience in more than a whisper all night. It was a very sedate concert really. The crowd was more enraptured than anything. I enjoyed Kathryn Williams too. Bitter sweet and lovely close harmonies. She was very funny between songs too.

Lots of students in the audience - not surprising since it was at Warwick Arts Centre on the University campus. I'm sure Ray attracted more than a representative number from the anarcho-hippy crowd. The smell of cardboard and lentils and unwashed jumpers was unmistakable. Good to know they're still around.

The rest of the weekend was pretty productive. Tidying, shopping and cooking on Saturday. Met G for lunch and got to see his workplace for the first time. It was fun watching him in action. We had a lovely walk on Sunday again. I foolishly challenged him to race up one of the steeper inclines - mainly to get away from some ramblers on our tail. As he dashed up the slope on tip-toes I was left gasping and scrabbling at tufts of grass. I think he was a bit worried about me - he made me put my hands on my head and breathe through my nose for a while at the top. Not sure what for, maybe just to make me look even sillier. Anyway, I had plenty of stamina to get me round the rest of the route without moaning and it wasn't me who fell asleep on the sofa when we got back!

Being out and about together made me keen to get working on the travel plans again. Hope this clear cold weather holds for our trip to The Beacons and Beyond this weekend.

Tabi pulls it off

Well done to Tabi for getting through her job re-interview this week. Her promotion is now permanent. Well deserved.

Odd kind of week this week. It's busy at work and although I feel better than I did on Monday, I've been lethargic and a bit miserable. I'm cross with myself for feeling miserable because I've really got no cause to be down. Vicious circle I expect.

I made it to the gym yesterday but then pretty much fell asleep on the sofa when I got home. I decided not to go dancing tonight. It requires a level of extroversion that I can't quite muster at the moment. I have stayed in and made more pumpkin soup instead, hoping the sunrise colours prove to lift my spirits.

Looking forward to the Ray LaMontagne gig on Sunday. Could be the catharsis I need for all this moody brooding.

Acopia

I was explaining my feeling of lethargy and inability to get anything done or know where to start to Tabi this morning. She said her friends Claire and Vicki refer to the condition as acopia. I am definitely borderline acopic today. Not sure what's wrong and I hope I snap out of it soon.

Sunday was lovely. I had probably been getting unnecessarily stressed about the visit with hindsight. I spent Saturday cooking up a rich ragu sauce for lasagne and not getting enough cleaning done. I was way behind on the jobs list when G came home, but the lasagne was all the better for the extra attention. G was marvellous and did loads of tidying up so we were able to start Sunday at a fairly leisurely pace with most of the cooking and cleaning done.

It absolutely chucked it down all day Sunday, but G's mum and dad didn't seem to mind staying in the house. It was a real pleasure to see them. Lots of chat about travelling and what we were going to do. G's mum is petrified for us and says she doesn't know anyone who has done anything similar and not gone down with horrendous food poisoning. Then she did point out that it wouldn't do us any harm to lose a few pounds. Fair point. Maybe I'll be able to turn the experience into a round-the-world diet book - 'Daren't Eat/Don't Eat'.

This week is looking busy at work. Will make a nice change, unless the acopia persists. In which case I am likely to fall to pieces. May try to get back to dancing class on Wednesday night if G decides to take up the invitation to some rugby training at the local club. His session will probably only last an hour, but I daresay there'll be some obligatory post-training guinness consumption. Would be good to get back into the swing of things dancing-wise.

Extra special good luck wishes to Tabi for her interview tomorrow. Knock their socks off sis - you know you can do it!

Performance art

Looking forward to the fireworks party tonight. It's the best work party of the year and it's a crispy sunny day today so it should be cold and clear this evening. Perfect conditions for a spectacular display, some warming soup and a pig in a bap or two. And this year I've got G to hold on to if the big bangs make me jump. Lovely :-)

Hope he enjoys it too. It means a lot to me that he's here to share it. He's a bit stressed about his house and is being plagued by utilities and banking admin errors at the moment. All a bit much. He needs some extra looking-after this weekend.

Have been feeling a bit out of sorts myself last couple of days. Had a tiring day yesterday attending a work conference in Birmingham. These things are always pretty draining and yesterday was no exception.

I spent a while daydreaming about plans, but no real progress. I'm worried I may have misrepresented Lara a bit in my last entry. She has offered heaps of practical, realistic advice about the unglamorous side of travelling and is doing her best to make me think things through before making any rash decisions. Might go to the Country Living Christmas Fair with her next week, but am really not sure it's worth facing the mad scrum. Would rather have a quiet coffee and a chat and a mooch around town. I don't really qualify as a fully paid-up Rayburn-babe either really.

Speaking of which, G's mum and dad are coming for Sunday lunch so am looking for alternatives to a big roast dinner, given the state of my puny oven. Feel a bit nervous as it's their first visit. I might have to resort to bangers and mash. Will see what G says. It might be safer still to take them down the pub.

Lots of housework tomorrow too. At least I haven't got to tackle the kind of deep cleansing Tabi had to deal with this week. Martha, the beloved kitten, must have eaten a long length or ribbon at some point a few days ago and woke Tabi and Sam up on Wednesday morning as it started to, erm, exit her system. Severely traumatised by the sensation, and with the thing half in and half out, Martha scooted about 'string painting' the entire house. Tabi was laughing by the time she phoned me, but only after she'd spent a good three hours scrubbing the decks.

Eaten by lions or worse

E-mailed Dad today to see what he thought about the big plan. I haven't really had much chance to talk to him about it in-depth yet. He replied: "Who do you think you are - Alan Whicker?"

He thinks it would be much better all round if we could find a way to do it safely, avoid dangerous countries and, preferably, come home every weekend :-)

It is quite a selfish thing to want to do I suppose. I know in reality we could be back home in a couple of days - even from somewhere remote - if anything were to go wrong at home or if we really weren't enjoying ourselves. I know I'd miss everybody terribly.

So many unknowns - but I really don't know how I'm going to react to having no home to speak of and I how I'm going to feel without family close by. But as Lara wrote to me today - you have to commit to the unknown sometimes.

My lovely sister

Can’t get over the difference in energy levels and outlook today. Yesterday was a write-off in terms of getting anything done, thinking useful thoughts or interacting with anybody in a meaningful way. I really would have been best off asleep on the sofa.

Woke up refreshed and happy today. Got loads done this morning already. Had a lovely chat with my beautiful sis at lunch time. Missing her very much. I keep looking at Cornwall photos longingly. Can’t wait for our New Year’s Eve get together and a pre-Christmas/birthday celebration weekend in December.

We’ve agreed to have a conference about Christmas purchases and what we’re going to get for people. I can’t believe it’s not that far away really.

She thinks G and I should get on with the big plan too. She told me we should just get out there and make some good memories