Nidification

It's worrying how easily I've slipped into updating this once a week. I was hoping to post updates more regularly, but then not a lot has been happening. Work has blocked access to blogger.com too so I can't easily get in and administer the site. Ho hum.

Christmas shopping has begun. Managed to get quite a lot done during lunch times last week. Still some major purchases to make though. Two days off next week should get things properly underway. I'm really looking forward to Christmas Day this year. First time in a while. It's got to be an improvement on last year when I was laid up with food poisoning. There was a chance I would have spent the whole holiday smelly, weak and alone if Dad hadn't driven down to rescue me. With Mum nursing a kidney stone too, the whole things was pretty unfestive.

I'm looking forward to seeing the folks on Boxing Day and can't wait for Cornwall and New Year, but I've always wanted a quiet, romantic Christmas. I can't believe how quickly things seem to have fallen into place this year. Just me and G at the barn. Presents under the tree, lovely simple food, a bracing walk, roaring fire and the Queen's speech. Splendid. Just got to order the organic chicken and find G the perfect present.

I knew it would happen, but I'm starting to panic about travel plans. Christmas planning is taking up a lot of mental capacity at the moment and I know that once January comes around we'll have so much to organise it's untrue. At the moment I can't believe it will happen at all. I also spent most of this week wishing it wouldn't. I'm enjoying work at the moment and spending time making the house nice and feeling secure and cosy. The thought of walking away from all that is distressing.

But then it's got to be healthy to go and have some adventures when everything else is in good order. I won't feel like I'm running away from anything. I've also been thinking about G and what a trusting and generous soul he is. He gave up his own security net to be with me and must miss friends and all his sporting activities that were nicely established. A big part of me wants to make it happen for him.

People who know us both are worried about the strain it'll put on our relationship if we do go. We're quite new to each other after all. But I have a sneaking suspicion it'll be the best thing about going away. We'll only have each other.